The age old saying that has been used to justify bullying in schools all over the United States. I recently watched Bullied, a movie about a gay teenager who sues his school in order to feel safe in his environment. I was one of the students who was bullied. It is one of the most debilitating experiences I have ever had, it affected everything from my schoolwork to socializing with others. I refused to do homework because I would just get it wrong and then be made of for being fat and stupid. I wouldn't socialize with others because I felt that the person who was being nice to me had ulterior motives to bully me with the information that they gained in that one day or week.
To be gay and bullied must be just as bad, if not worse because it is who they are. They don't have a choice (I don't believe that it is a choice) to be who they are and it must be terrifying and scary to be bullied for being gay.
I want to be that one teacher, who does not have tenure yet (and has not taught for very long) and I want to help the student who is doing the bullying. I, personally, have been torn about this issue for the last semester. Because I feel that by giving my attention to the bully (Who may be diagnosed EBD or ADHD) that I am betraying the student who that student is bullying. For instance, I may end up teaching in the Juvenile Justice System where I will teach students who have murdered someone or attempted to murder someone. I have been struggling with this idea of if I am trying to help this student who really needs help, am I hurting the person whom they hurt in the first place?
But I see now that there are reasons behind bullying. On Glee right now (I am really into that show), one of the characters that keeps beating Kurt (an openly gay student) up ends up being gay. He is a bully to Kurt because he has suppressed his sexuality. If you look at functional behavioral analysis, it requires you to see and try and find out what the function is behind that specific behavior (I learned that in SPED 431).
I had a strong support system at home with regards to bullies, my parents never cared about what other people thought of them, so I got that same idea. They also told me that all of what the students who bullied me told me was a bunch of bs (They told me that I was so fat that my parents shouldn't even love me and then spit on my food). They fought for me when I really needed them (i.e. when I was attacked 3 on 1 during recess when I walked a few feet with all 3 on my back and finally went down), they helped me through all of this stuff.
But, I cannot change the home support system, but I can say that my classroom is a haven. If there is any bullying in my classroom, an intervention must be attempted. I don't know how exactly I am going to teach students who bully other students, but I will. Because they clearly have a hard time expressing their emotions, maybe it is because of the movies they watch or that thought that runs through movies and different media outlets like that that men don't have emotions.
But I recognize that women bully as well. And with this issue as well, I wish I had something to say. Because female bullying, according to Brad Kuhlman, seems to be much more social meanness (They ostracize the student rather than attack the student).
I hope that by the time I am in the classroom, I will have figured out how I am going to deal with bullying in my classroom as well as the hallways. I am very inexperienced, but I want to become more experienced.
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